Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Off to new adventures..Out with the old and In with the new!!

....So here I am. Life is crazy. Forgive me for not posting for a whole 2 weeks! Ahhhh! It has been eating at me. It really has. I lay in bed thinking about my blog and how I feel like I have neglected it. But here I am and here to stay! Life has been hectic. So much going on. But in the end, all is well and I am happy and ready for new adventures.

Lately, a lot of change has happened.
Change is defined:

To transform or convert.

I love the way that sounds. To transform. When change occurs, we can't just sit back and let it happen. I think choice goes hand in hand in change. Things may happen that cause change, yet we must choose how we want to take it. We have a choice as to how we react and what we want from it. We must transform into what is to come and also what we want to become.

All of us arent just a body or a mind. We are so much more. Change helps us to define we who are and reach the potentials within us. It simply means to grow.

I believe that resistence to change comes from a fear of the unknown. It is a fear as to not knowing what to expect, to know, to see. Change can definetely be scary let me tell you. Experiencing change has freaked me out to say the least. But, when I sit down and really think about it, change makes me who I am. Whether it be good or bad, it helps shape me for the better.

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First and foremost, I am applying to study abroad in China. It sounds very scary but so much fun!! It will be through a group called ilp and I would go to teach english. There is so much I wanna do with my life and feel like now is prime time to do it. I can't just sit back and wish I could do something..I must make it happen and WILL. Talk about a change..ha! Not only to live on my own but in a foreign country. I love it though. It sounds like an experience that couldn't be more awesome. Again, it would help me to grow into what I want to become.
I have made it a goal to attend the temple weekly to do baptisms for the dead. If any of you dont know what that is, email me to get more information. I have had this hunger lately to want the best I possibly can in life. I want to be closer to the Lord and strive to be like Him. Doing baptisms is honestly one of my favorite things to do. The spirit is so strong and there is truly no better feeling then being there. I want to change to become who I know I can be.

I have been so set on becoming a sports nutritionist, and don't get me wrong I still want to. Being a dietician is how my mind functions. But lately I have had this bug in my head telling me to look into labor and delivery nurse.

WHAT THE HECK?! I like knowing what I want and working hard to get there. Now with this idea forming in my head, at first it freaked me out because I am thinking "I have been so set on what I want what does it have to change," but then after talking to a friend, he described that not knowing what you really want at first is good. It helps you to draw out your options and to find what really suits you. Then it makes you work harder for it because you know thats what you really want. Now I am not saying I am going to become a nurse, yet having other options is nice.I think it would be so rewarding to help delivery and care for these sweet new babies coming into the world. I like the pressure it requires because people are relying on you. Having this change helps me to see what I really want in my life. Luckily those 2 career paths are both medical so I am on my way with both but who knows where life takes me. But to be honest, I can't wait! Thank goodness for change :)

Last and most important.......
My mother is engaged.
Pretty crazy I know. She is going to be married in July to Reed Flake. Wow so many crazy/intense/nervous/exciting thoughts going through my head. Now this is a prime example of CHANGE. My dad passed away almost 6 years ago in July. That I must say was one of the most life changing experiences I have ever encountered. Yet what happened from it..? I have grown in ways I never thought possible. Change can sometimes mean trials. I believe in that situation it was a major trial that forced change upon me. It was hard. It still is hard. I struggle every day, yet I know it happened for a reason.I choose to take good from it and to let it effect me in a beneficial way. I can sincerely say that I am a better person for it. I am becoming who I want to because of that experience alone. It helped me to see an eternal perspective and for that I am so grateful. My mom has worked so hard for the past 6 years to try and survive and take care of us girls. She is amazing. She has dated Reed for the past 7 months and is now engaged to be married to him. Reed is great. He is a stud. One thing I love most about Reed is that he is kind and loves my mom. I know he will take care of her. My mom is my pride. I am very protective over her because I love her so much. I love Reed because he will support my mom and love her just as much as I do. It is weird I'm not gunna lie and is going to be a HUGE change. Yet, I know it is for the best. I know it is right. I know through this change that it is helping me to grow. It is helping me to reach my greatest potential. Although it is scary, I can't let my fear scare me away. Change is good. Change is what life is all about. I am so excited for Reed and Mom and am excited for more family! Because ultimetly there is nothing more important in my life then my family.

Change happens for a reason. Change is all about how we perceive it. Change is what we make of it. So bring it oonnnn :)

xoxo Lex

11 comments:

  1. great post lex! you are so right and so wise beyond your years. i think china will be awesome for you. you will rock the english vocab...make sure to use hooked on phonics ;). i love you girl.

    now...
    wut thheeee?? niki is gonna get it...hehehe
    yay!!!! im so happy for your mom! reed is one lucky man.

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  2. great perspective lex. we are all experiencing lots of change, aren't we?!

    mom's ring is gorgeous! it's so weird and sad to me that i'm not there to see it in person!

    thanks for posting pics.

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  3. GOOOO MAMA CRUM!!! I am so happy for her and Reed.

    Although my situation is different then yours, I think of my moms husband Gary. Now that he is apart of my life, I couldn't imagine being without him. I've learned that there is no limit for how many fathers/dad we can have (or use).

    PS. I have heard so many wonderful things about the ILP program. I want to go with my husband and teach.

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  4. Hey, I read ur post about going to China. My cousin just got back from China. She taught kids english also. She said it's amazing, and so much fun. You get to experience new things, especailly food, but she says you'll have an amazing time.

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  5. You are such a great girl Lexi! I think going to China is an awesome idea! And I can TOTALLY see you as a labor and delivery nurse! What a crazy time in life for you and your fam... Congrats to your Mama! What a gorgeous ring, Reed sounds like a great, great guy.

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  6. ahhhh.... Congrats to you all! For one man to win a Crum heart he must be the luckiest man on earth... Surely Reed knows that he was prayed into your family. And Papa john must be so proud of the way his girls support and love their mother. Smiles all around! There is no room in the Eternities for stagnant water... Keep things changing.
    sure love you.

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  7. Hey! I'll ask my cousin what program she was with. And no, I'm not relate to Diana. I was her buddy in Best Buddies. She's so sweet, I love that girl! I'll let you know what else my cousin says about China. You'll do great as a delivery nurse, you seem like an awesome person!

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  8. lexi!! soo i'm totally going to mexico for ILP next spring! I got accepted a few months ago, and I'm so excited. There's a bunch of blogs that I know of from people that went to China though! I'll have to give you the links! So funn!! love your blog
    kaitlyn

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  9. I love you Lex! What more can I say? You are a great girl- the best! Great post! You are a great writer. It made me cry. You have so much strength. Your life is headed in the right direction- so many exciting things that await you. Don’t let anything hold you back. I love and miss you! See ya in July! :)

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  10. Yay temple! I go tues/thurs if you ever want a buddy!

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  11. Hey Lexie it's Kim Adams! I can't tell you how excited I am for your Mom and Reed! I almost feel like we'll be related in a weird way too since my sister is married to a Flake and when they're down here, we're always at Reed's! Anyway, just wanted to say congrats and I'm so happy! Great blog btw ;)

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